Colts vs. Steelers 9/25/11

They’re just coming back from half time.  I missed the first half of the game because I was watching the indie movie, Spooner.  It was really really sweet.  Matthew Lillard is pretty adorable in it.

So where are we.  The Colts are blue and white.  Nice clean uniforms.  Not sure why they’re blue and white, colts are baby horses so they should be brown with fringe or something, but…they’re sharp so that’s good.

The game is on NBC so Michele Tafoya is on the ground in purple and really talking into that mic.  Not sure what she’s talking about but she seems to be confident that she’s communicating about football.

I guess the Bills vs. Patriots was an insane game today.  It wasn’t on TV, so I didn’t see it.  But Buffalo won, and the Patriots are allegedly a really good team so it was an exciting game.

If I went to a football game, it’d be a night game.  That’s how you’d want to do it I think.  You’d want to be cozy in a jersey and a hat and nachos.  With a cool breeze.

PIT 10 IND 13 (that’s the score)

The Steelers, as usual, look pissed off.

James Harrison and Lamarr Woodley are on the screen.  The announcers are comparing their “sacks.”  I guess neither of them have any!  Boy I hope he’s is talking about a different kind of sack than I’m thinking of.

BTW: Lamarr Woodley is on Twitter.  Just incase you wanted to follow him @LaMarrWoodley. But I should warn you, he’s like obsessed with ancient Egypt.  His handle is “Pharaoh Redwood” and his background is a giant King Tutankhamen.  So yes, I think I’m in love.

Dick Lebeau is the Steelers defensive coordinator.  And he’s 74 years old.  Dang.  He looks good for 74.  I hope that when I’m 74 I’m working a job I love so much that I won’t leave it to go read Dean Koontz novels on an Alaskan cruise ship.  Does Alaska have a football team?  No.  They don’t.  But they should.  And they should be mighty and great.

Wow, these announcers are really talking about sacks today.  I have watched a lot of football games now and never heard them talking about sacks.  Must be trending.

Whoa, Steeler #64 (Doug Legursky?) is a big dude.  Scary big.  Not just any scary, Steelers scary!

SNF sounds so gross.  Brings to mind a snail fart.

These plays are fast.  These guys can move pretty fast when they want to.  I feel like they don’t get to run free enough.  They are caged animals!!!!

Roethlisberger got scared and just threw it far away and no one caught it.  Total chaos.  The crowd loves the chaos.  They are going nuts!! That time Roethlisberger got a clear shot and threw it to #83 (Tight End, Heath Miller?) who caught it.  Wow.  These guys are fast and hard in this game.  They’ve totally got their hearts in it.  Maybe they bet a lot of money on themselves.

2^nd & 11.  Whatever that means.

Wow, the Colts fans are going nut sacks.  Are these team rivals?  This game feels more intense than it ought to.  Maybe it’s the caveman violence the Steelers put forth.

The Steelers coach guy should be played by the guy on the wire who played the boxer.  You know, the guy from Terrible Bosses.  Or was it Horrible Bosses?  I didn’t see it, I just saw that that guy from The Wire was in it.  And I was like, Oh good he’s working!  So far in my “The Cast of the Wire is The NFL” I’ve cast Chad Coleman (Cutty) as Mike Tomlin and Domenick Lombardozzi (Herc) as Brian Urlacher.  WAIT STOP!  I was wrong.  I just google image searched Mike Tomlin and he doesn’t look anything like Chad Coleman.  He looked like him in the moment though.  Maybe he has a similar intensity.  So, even though Chad Coleman doesn’t look just like him, I’m certain he’d portray him brilliantly.

“Play football you damn Steeler bastards!!”

 It’s Mark Hamill’s birthday today.  I wonder if Mark Hamill likes football.  If he does, I’d be surprised.

Maurice LaMarche does the VO for Lexus commercials.  And ever since I found out about it (I think from the Rob Paulsen podcast) I can’t stop hearing Calculon when those commercials come on, which is a lot.  Apparently football fans can afford a Lexus.  Calculon is totally the Lexus of robots.

Peyton Manning is in the coach’s box up top.   He had surgery or something and isn’t playing for a while.  They really hope that he’ll play this season because he’s so famous.

Incomplete pass to a Colt.  Now a Colt punted the ball.

Steeler #83 (Heath Miller?) caught a good pass.  The crowd is not happy.  Chaos.

Let’s go to Michele down on the field. She’s talking about someone who has uneven shoulders.  She’s not talking about herself because if her shoulders were uneven you’d be able to tell in that purple top she’s got on.

Colt #23 (Terrence Johnson?) just body bumped Roethlisberger out of bounds. It was sort of funny.  These guys are like heat seeking missile.  Or Sack seeking missiles.

Flag on the field!!  Pass interference.  Colt #51 (Pat Angerer?  I wouldn’t want to make him angerer! But seriously it sounds like he should be a Steeler with that name.) automatic 1^st down.  I guess that’s like in baseball when you get to walk if you get too many balls, or sacks if you will.

Has anyone made a career of painting these football players and majestic mythical creatures?  I think that’d be a good way to get fantasy nerds into football and football fans into magic.  A football playing centaur would be pretty sexy.  More sexy than this crude portrayal:

Photo stolen from: http://mattstooks.com/labels/sports.html

Another penalty!!  Holding was called on Steeler #72 Jonathon Scott!!  If I was in the DJ booth every time someone got called for holding, I’d hit a clip of the song, “I wanna hold your hand.”

Oh FYI, we’re in the 4^th quarter now.  Not sure when that happened.  You’d think there’d be like a whistle blow or something.

Wow, Steeler #88 Emmanuel Sanders caught a good pass.  SNailFarts!!!!!

Actually on the replay it didn’t look as far.  But the announcers say it’s really good for Sanders.

These guys have a lot of tattoos.  Is there a database of all the NFL tats?  That should be a tab on NFL.com.  I’m sure if I search “NFL Tattoos” I’ll just get a bunch of hillbilly tats that say “Gators” or something.

That Colt mascot is pretty cute.  They should utilize him more.  Give him his own energy drink!!  ColtyzJoltz!!

And I’ve lost the game.  Argh.  My DVR changed channels because I’m trying to tape too many things at once!  Sorry Steelers vs. Colts but the Amazing Race Season Premiere is on.  Also Breaking Bad is happening.  I’m sort of over Breaking Bad.  I just watch it so I know what people are tweeting about.

I just looked it up and it looks like the Steelers won 23 to 20.  Hmmm…sounds like I missed some watch shots.  I bet it got pretty chaotic over there in Indianapolis.  Hearts were broken, bleachers were trampled, and nachos were enjoyed by all.

I love you and I hope you love football as much as me.

Hugs&kissesxoxoxoxo